Little Riot Girl pt 3

There were a few minor obstacles to be dealt with here and there.
At about 28 weeks (I think) I started having a lot of contractions. They would be about 5 minutes apart for about an hour, drop to ten minutes apart for an hour, fade away for a bit, do it again... all lasting around five or so hours at a time. Lame. The general consensus was I was just doing too much and had an "Irritable Uterus" so I was put on "Modified Bed Rest". Basically, quit running around for 5-12 hours a day and spend more time at home. If I went out to say the grocery for an hour, I need to go home and rest for two. That sort of thing.

It actually did seem to help.

At my last growth check ultrasound, we however, got more bad news.
My little Riot is not growing and striving in the womb.
She was in the 67th percentile for growth, then dropped to34, then all the way down to the 9th.

Her head was measuring on target but her abdomen was measuring two weeks behind. This gave her the diagnosis of Asymetrical Interuterine Growth Restriction.

It means that something is not functioning correctly within the womb and she is pulling what nutrients she can get to her brain and not getting the fat deposits and overall growth that she should.

Because of this she needs to be monitored very closely. If the conditions in the womb stay stable, she can stay in, week to week. But if she starts to show any signs of distress or drops weight or is overall not striving she needs to be pulled out fairly quickly.

IUGR is tied closely to stillbirth. :-(

The overall prognosis is we are trying to keep her in as long as possible, but get her out before the environment in the womb deteriorates.

We know that she will *most* likely have to come out as soon as she is to term. For some reason the incident of stillbirth dramatically increases after 37 weeks.
We know that no matter how long she stays in, she'll be small. She will most likely have to visit the NICU for a bit. IUGR babies are normally born between 3-5 pounds. The good news is, because she is already over three pounds, she should be one of the "bigger" IUGR babies. Hopefully, she'll stay in long enough for her lungs to be developed.

IF all the things line up correctly, she'll stay healthy in there until closer to the end of June, her lungs will be developed, she'll be close to five pounds, and I can have a normal (although induced) vaginal birth.

The complications that could come up revolve around if she is in distress or if she is still able to get nutrients and oxygen. She might have to be induced early. We might only be allowed to do a c-section because sometimes the stress of labor is too much for an already stressed, small baby.
We might have to do steroid shots to boost her lung development for an early delivery.

There's a whole lot of if's involved right now.

My doctors say that with proper monitoring I have no higher risk of stillbirth than anyone else as of right now. That it will be a slow deterioration with warning signs. After her next growth check, from there we will develop more of a plan.
Right now we are doing a growth check one week and the next week a Biophysical Profile. Depending on how they go, we will add in more doctor visits with more ultrasounds and more NST's.



I can't say I'm not a little scared again. I was fine with the clubfoot, but this does make me more concerned again about 'further issues'. The keep telling me that they are unrelated and I have no 'higher risk' than anyone else.. they actually say I have a lower chance than anyone else at the moment because we've already ruled out pretty much everything and the ultrasounds would have picked up anything else abnormal by this point. I'm also still scared that she won't be coming home with me. I'm scared she'll pass in the womb before I get a chance to rush to the hospital, even though they assure me that won't happen. I'm scared she'll have problems in the NICU and maybe not do well. Overall, I'm scared of not knowing.


I'm a little bit of a control freak to an extent. I at least need to know. I need to know what I'm facing. I need to know how to plan. I need to know what to research, what I can do. But I can't. I can't really know or plan for anything right now.

I don't know what comes with having a preemie baby. I don't know what comes with having a preemie baby with special needs. I don't know what "Stuff" is best... should I get a swing? Should I get a bouncer? Are they too 'stimulating" or "stressful"? Do they put her at the wrong angle? Is her casts going to be too heavy on her hips to be sat in those things? How do I sling her with casts? How do I sling a preemie baby? How do I sling a Preemie baby with Casts? Holy crap! It's just all very scary and very challenging.

I'm afraid for our birth. I'm scared of c-sections. I'm scared of not making the right decisions based on my fears. I'm afraid that the "Holistic Crunchy Mama" in me is trained too well in birth and medical interventions to make the RIGHT choices for Riot. What is I am so afraid of the interventions that I refuse something that she really needs? What if my birth fears make things harder for her, or make her not make it at all?

I'm afraid of what is going to happen after the birth. I'm afraid that I might reject her a little because she is not the "baby I dreamed of" instead of celebrating her for the baby she IS. I feel terrible for that.

I'm afraid that she will not be breathing, that her lungs will be too small, that there will be something wrong, she'll be too weak. That she'll be whisked away for testing and procedures and I won't even be able to see her. I"m afraid of PPD/PPA. I'm afraid of how I'll be treated.

I'm afraid of her being in the NICU. I'm afraid our breastfeeding relationship and bonding will be affected. I'm afraid of what the time I'll have to be away will do to my Rebel girl. I'm afraid the tubes and monitors will scare me. I'm afraid of coming home without my baby.

I'm afraid of Bringing her home. What do I do? What will having a tiny baby mean?

I'm afraid of what people will say. What will they think? Will we get mean looks? Pathetic looks of sympathy? Will people make mean comments about her casts? Will people think I've hurt her?

There's so much. So much to be scary. So much to be afraid of.

I'm holding up. I'm being strong. I'm taking things day by day.

But this blow after blow is starting to get to me. I can't enjoy this pregnancy at all. I know it's my last and that makes it all even more bitter. I already know I won't be able to enjoy my birth and that also makes me very bitter.

But I'll love my little Riot no matter what. I DO overall, have faith that things are going to be fine. I have faith that I can handle all of this. I have faith my little Riot choose me and she is going to be the perfect addition to our family. I just have to get her here. :-)

Little Riot Girl Pt 2

20 weeks to 24 went pretty well.
Other than some awful morning sickness in the very start things had gone okay and the pregnancy had not been overtly bad.
I was a little concerned how nursing my Rebel girl and being pregnant would good. (And honestly, that should be a whole other blog post) but health wise it did not appear to be affecting me or Riot.
I was insanely tied some days, but eh, I'm insanely tired some days when I'm not pregnant. :-)

We went to our 24 week ultrasound to get the rest of her measurements. It was taking awhile without a lot of talking and I was started to get concerned that something was wrong.

The ultrasound tech kind of looked over and said, "Your baby has clubfoot affecting both feet." I had heard of clubfoot before. I was, of course, a little crushed and concerned. She said, it's not a big deal and it is pretty easily corrected. Even that one of the girls that worked with her was born with two clubfeet. However, it can be linked to other issues and that is why they were trying to get a better look at some things.

We had still not seen her face and we wanted to rule out cleft palate for sure. Knowing there was one genetic defect was bad enough without having to have the concern that there could be more. I wasn't sure how to feel or what to think at that point.

For the most part we were told that everything they could see was checking out okay. They were able to confirm she had all her fingers and all her toes (and no extra) they were able to see that the cord had the proper  chambers, the heart the proper chambers, the brain checked out etc etc. She looked okay other than the feet but there were still a few things we needed to check out and she was not cooperating. (Little Riot)

We were told the doctor would come in and talk to us. We waited.
And waited. I was getting anxious and panic'y.

I was trying to tell myself, it wasn't a big deal. Things would be fine. No big deal. It was just clubfoot, you do some casting and bracing and it's over. But the concept and idea of MORE issues was weighing very heavy on me. As well as, what did this mean? How was her first few months going to go? Does this affect my birth choices at all? Will she be whisked away from me after birth? etc etc

The doctor came in and it went exactly like this, no joke

Doctor walks in, goes straight to ultrasound monitor, flips through images:
Doctor: "So your baby has clubfoot (.) (?) " - not sure if it was a statement or question
Me, "Yes, I guess it appears so"
Doctor: "Well, do you know what this means, do you have any questions?"
Me: "Well, yes, I guess probably about a 100"
Doctor: "we will schedule you a follow up"
Doctor hands chart to nurse, walks out.


Super duper frikin awesome.

thank goodness gracious that I had an appointment at my regular OB right after.
I finished checking out. Dropout had to go back to work, things were crazy over there that day and I went to my OB.

I think I added some things into the ultrasound above that I actually didn't know until I met with him.
He was the one to tell me that everything else looked good. He said she had her fingers and toes, and the cord was good, placenta, she had all her organs, the heart looked good, spine looked good, basically that there was no reason to believe it would be anything more than a case of clubfoot.
He said that combined with my quad screening that came up with next to no chance of Down Syndrome, Tri 13/18 and other "big" issue genetic conditions that things looked okay.

That was very reassuring. I'm grateful he was able to at least somewhat calm those fears.

From there we had to meet with the genetic counselor.
That meeting actually went well. The GC was very sweet. Dropout was not able to get off work. (We had been trying to avoid him taking any actual time off so he'd have more with Riot got her) so I brought Erin along who is a friend of mine. She was really sweet to come with me.

The GC said that Clubfoot is actually one of the most common birth defects and normally it is not associated with any other conditions. There's a few things that seem to be connected but because of the quad screening we had pretty much ruled them out. We talked some more about family history. It turns out after this came out that my mother told me my uncle had been born with clubfoot, also Dropout had a mild version that they call "pigeon toed" and a few other mild cases like that apparently ran on both sides of the family.

Therefore, I left pretty confident that there was nothing left to be concerned about. It was just a random case of genetic bilateral clubfoot and she'd just be a little special needs for a little while. No big deal. :-)


I did a lot of research. I needed to prepare myself for what we would be looking at.
What the plan was going to be. How we should treat it. Where are the best doctors?

I found a method of treatment that I really liked called the Ponseti Method. I found a great support group online of moms (and dads) from all over that have used the method. It was nice to find that.

The doctor that was closest to me and recommend was in Atlanta, GA. So I set up a consultation.

We set up a babysitter for Rebel (and Lil, Oh, who's now decided she wants her online nickname to be Punky) and drove down to Atlanta. It wasn't that bad of a drive.

Dr. Schrader kind of looked at us like we were crazy though. He said there was no point in me driving all the way down there because there's a doctor in Knoxville that he knew and trained with and would do a good job.

But hearing that from a recommended doctor did reassure me.
He confirmed what we would be looking at treatment wise.

About 4-14 days after birth we will start a casting process. The casts will go from toes to thighs and will be changed out once a week for about 5-6 weeks. From there she will have a small surgery to clip the Achilles tendon. Then she will go back into a cast for three weeks while that heals. From there she will get special shoes that have a bar that connects across the bottom and she will wear it close to 24 hours a day for about six months. Then she'll wear it less and less until she's only wearing it at night for about 4 years.

Overall, no big deal.

We were joking about ways to make it 'fun". Having someone decorate her casts. Painting them. Making funny t shirts for nosy people in public, lol that sort of thing.

I'm sort of interested in how it is going to challenge some of my 'crunchy' parenting practices.
Babywearing for example is going to be challenging but I'm very interested in trying!
Nursing will be a bit of a challenge with the casts and the bar, and I'm sure co sleeping could prevent a few challenges too... So there's some new fun crunchy challenges I'll have to face parenting a special needs baby.

I'll be sure to update and blog a little more on how all of that goes!

But there's still a little more to come...

My Little Riot Girl pt 1

So many times I've meant to come and update this. So many times I felt like I should come here and share what was going on.
At first I wanted to share the exciting news that we were once again expecting! But then, I didn't get around to it.
Then I wanted to share that we were going to have a new little baby girl! We were happy and excited about our new little one. She was a little difficult in the womb like her big sister Rebel so we nicknamed her Riot.

I wanted to come and tell everyone about our new bundle and all of our excitement.

Then the bad news started coming in. It was one thing, and then another, and then another. I wanted to blog it at that point just to document it. To share my emotions as I went through this step by step.

I wanted to share the research I was doing. The thoughts that all but encompassed my life.

But I guess while I was living it, and people knew, I wasn't really ready to face it all.

As I am pretty much weeks from delivery, I'm going to go through this as step by step as I can.

I AM still expecting. She is still very loved and very much anticipated. We still love each and every aspect of our little Riot. It's just been a bit of a hard journey so far.

So, this is part one.

First, we had somewhat planned and talked about adding a new little one into the family at *some* point. There had been no clear decisions made. However, in the mean time as I'd blogged before with the hives they had a suspension that I had a progesterone allergy and pulled me off birth control. We were doing the Natural Family Planning route... and honestly, it was working great lol because I pretty much knew the exact time and moment that little Riot was conceived. I knew I was ovulating, and knew something should be done to 'prevent' said little Riot from being conceived but thought, oh what will ONE TIME do? lol 

So here we were about 4 weeks later. I was still nursing so no real cycles to track or be late from so to speak so I took a test 'just in case' and figured it was just out of paranoia. Lo and behold the little plus sign came up pretty quick.

I think Dropout and I were both a little flabbergasted but we were still happy and excited. I'm a pretty fertile chic apparently ;-)

Everything seemed to go okay in the start. My doctor checked my levels immediately and did an ultrasound to date and make sure things looked okay after my previous losses and issues. I like that they take things seriously there and try to do what they can to make things go smooth from the start.

Other than a scare or two in the beginning when we couldn't find her, then couldn't find a heartbeat later on, things went smooth. My uterus is very tilted. (Almost "backwards" they say) so ultrasounds can be hard.

We had another scare later on when the doctor tried to use the doppler to hear the heartbeat, even at a point we should be able to, and couldn't find it and I had to be rushed to an ultrasound to check. Did an ultrasound on the tummy and couldn't find her, then had to do a vaginal ultrasound and found her. It was scary to be so far and feel like something could have happened. But it was just my silly uterus again and things were fine.

My thyroid meds had to be adjusted twice to make sure that things were okay and we had to do lots of bloodwork and checking but otherwise things were looking good. :-)

We were excited about going to our 20 week ultrasound to confirm things were going okay and find out what gender our little one was.

Dropout left work to come and we found out that we were having another little girl. Everything looked good on the ultrasound. She was being a little difficult and they couldn't do all the check off's they do at the 20 week ultrasound so we were told come back in 4 weeks to get the rest. But what they could see, looked good.

The plan was to come back in four weeks and get a look at the other organs and things we had been unable to see, then once a month for a growth check due to my autoimmune and thyroid issues.

It's always busy in this crunchy mama's house!

I've had a lot going on and a lot of planning for things that will be going on so it seems like every down time minute is even taken over by something lately.

It's SPRING! Well, almost. The weather has been nice and it makes me feel so unfocused! I get so antsy and anxious and just want to be doing things! Anything!

Homeschooling has been a little lax lately. I kind of admit we've pretty much given up on our curriculum at the moment. The curriculum we were using was a bit boring and unstimulating to my girl unfortunately and she was going through it so fast that I had to all but abandon it so we wouldn't have it done half way through the year.

We have been supplementing with different things. We do Math from a curriculum still, but not daily. Weekly though.

On Wednesday's she still has her home school co op which has all the same fun classes from Science to history to Taekwondo. She also has a Science class at the zoo every week and a

PE/Health class twice a week so it's not like she's not doing anything.

The little one had her first birthday party. It was lots of fun. I made her a yummy Pumpkin Apple Harvest Cake. Low sugar and full of good stuff. She didn't get the crazy messy first birthday pictures but she still had a great time.

Her grandma, aunt and cousin got to come down from out of state to visit and she got lots of fun toys to play with so overall she had a good first birthday.

I'm making plans for starting a garden this year. I tried a container garden last year and failed pretty miserably, haha. Maybe this year it will go a little better if I actually get things in the ground. So I'm in the works of planning that out.

I'm also planning out Lil's home school curriculum for next year. Which of course takes up quite a bit of time. Trying to plan out activities and what we will be involved in is a daunting task in itself. It is somewhat amazing all the options and experiences that a homeschooling kid can have around here. Not to mention the hundreds, if not thousands, of options you can have when putting together curriculum.

I've got a few speeches I'm doing for different groups and organizations coming up as well. On fun crunchy mama type of topics ;-) So I've been trying to work that into the agenda to work on.

Also, I became the Co-Leader for our local Holistic Mom's Chapter and I am very excited about this new task and opportunity. I've already got quite a bit in the works for that and things I am going to help out with.

So, I think that's what has been going on in a nutshell. Trying to plan for the Spring/Summer in aspects of daily life/Activities/Garden and then farther into the Fall for Schooling.

I'm so excited about all the fun things that the nice weather brings!

Well I'm Gross and DCS Should be Called

I recently read a wonderful blog by the darling "Blossom" Mayim Bialik.

She outlines her parenting choices and while stating she is not about labels, makes it clear she falls into the Attachment Parenting crowd. ;-)

I must say I was very impressed by her views. Of course, probably because she shared mine. In pretty much all accounts.

What I wanted to get into here though, was the comments against her breastfeeding of her two year old son.

I was a little flabbergasted. I am going to copy and paste in a few of my 'favorites'. Simply because, sometimes, I feel it's nice to know what others are thinking but often not saying.

(This was taken from Facebook. I'd thought about removing the names, but thought, nah, It was posted on a public site, so why bother. Guess if I get in trouble or someone tells me about some law I'm unaware of, I'll come back and remove them.)

Martha Fikes-Duke Sorrry, thats disgusting at 2 years old!

Stacy Higginbotham if they need to e off the bottle by the age of 1 they need to be off the tit to.

Raina Achimon Hood teeth=stop breastfeeding

Cathy Davis Yeah.... if your kid is getting old enough to possibly remember that then it's time to stop.

Elizabeth Ginnis I agree with the bottle comment. If they should be off the bottle by a year old they should be done with the breast too!! After awhile you need to question why its really being done at so old. If you want them to continue drinking breast milk is there a reason you couldn't pump it? Yuck!!

Rosemarie A Newhook Drew If the child should be on a cup at 1 then they should no longer be breastfeeding. Breastfeeding beyond that is not for the child, it is for the parent.

Kelli Hytinen i wish these 2 year olds would bite the nipples off the moms who keep breastfeeding after 6 months to a year. that is nasty. toddlers need more nutrition from different sources by the time they are that age.

Judy Seidel Sweren Breastfeeding your 21/2 yr old is just odd and sleeping all together in one bed is just lazy parenting to me.

Ruth LaFord Freak=raising freaks, very sad

Nikki Gizewski-Naroleski All of you people who think its completely normal to breast feed a 2 year old are completely messed up in the head and need to have DCFS come out to your homes and investigate you for child abuse. How absolutely sick!

Laura Wolfe Franga After a certain age (6 to 9 months) there are no medical benefits for the child... it then becomes a MENTAL issue for the mother!!!

Virginia Acosta When your child is old enough to ask for the boob, it's way past the time to stop giving it to him.

Tanya Farley IF your child can lift up your shirt because he is thirsty (and I have seen it happen) then he/she is too darn old.

Elyse Angelico-Dumas I'm sorry but if your child can walk up to you and either ask for it or get it themselves then it's time to STOP breastfeeding ~ just sayin!

Melissa Gleaton ‎@ Tara Jo - in those countries, the families don't have FOOD to feed their children. They have no choice. It's the only food they have. NOT the case here.

Melissa Gleaton one word comes to my head when I read this - SLAVE. And to think that she thinks it's ok for her kids to NOT thank her for things is disgusting.

Carol Lopez Breastfeeding a 2 yr old is out of the question. It should be like weening them off the bottle at 12 mo old. And those mothers who cont it is just lazyness on their part. Do you start potty training at 5yr old! Get with the times ladies. You are teaching the child to be dependant on you and they will never become dependent on their own!

Faith Brewster Summers OMG That is horrible and who is she kidding she is doing it for her benefit not the kid's. I can't even believe someone is that stupid and thinks it is even ok. Wake up your child is 2 HELLO. This child will have problems in school and life. What is the mom gonna say when her says they are picking on me at school? So I guess you are introducing us to our next psycho. Hmmmmm

Faith Brewster Summers I think not . So guess she will still be doing this in 1st grade. Heck why would she stop??? The child is 2 and she hasn't. Heck lets just go for stopping Senior year. Just flat out stupid. She just gets off on it. She want admit to it. Sick.

Kathryn Winkler Beach To each their own but to me gross. If they can have a conversation with you, they don't need to be drinking from your tit.

My own personal favorite was the irony of this one, taken from the main site's comments:

"...And the nursing your baby/toddler. Again, I have nothing against nursing your baby, but when it comes to a full set of teeth, bring on the solid foods and milk from a cow. Breasts are for babies and husbands. There I said it."

hahahahahahahaha

Breasts are for babies and husbands but cow's milk is for human children, eh? Oooookkkkaaaaaayyyyyy

That makes a whole lot of sense.

Okay, my counter attacks here.

Really, are we not pretty much saying the few same things over and over?

"If they have teeth, it's time to stop."
First of all, are we unaware that babies can be BORN with teeth? They can. 1 in 2,000 babies are. Other babies typically get their first tooth between 4 and 7 months of age. So these babies that are born with teeth, should they not be allowed to nurse? If a baby gets a tooth early at three months it's time to call it quits? I just simply do not understand that mind set. I breastfed a child with a full set of teeth and never really 'felt' the teeth. You don't wean from a bottle when they have teeth, right? So why would breast be any different?

"if they can ask for it, it's time to stop"
My little one has been 'signing' for milk since about six months old. She's really good at it now at almost a year. She also says milk too. I'm assuming a baby of about the same age would be asking for a bottle too, correct? Why would that be an indication that nursing should no longer be allowed? If my child can ask for a carrot, are they too old for a carrot? I just don't get it.

"breasts are for the bedroom"
Okay, I can't really even justify this one with much at all. Does my husband enjoy my breasts? Well, yes, of course. Does that mean that nether of us can accept and see that they were meant as a source of nutrition for a child? Of course not. I think everyone knows (well, maybe not!) that breasts were made to produce milk. That's their job. That's why we have them. Anything more than that, (my husband's bedroom toys, looking good in a sweater, being a good pillow for my cats) is all extra perks.

"The mother is getting off on it"
And this one gets a big, "Wow" from me, each time I hear it. Let me tell you, as much as I am an advocate for nursing, as much as I enjoy the ease, the benefits, and the bonding, It is not always 'fun' to nurse. First, I've had lots of problems. I've had clogged ducts, thrush and yeast, breast infections, milk blisters, latch problems, etc etc... It's not always fun. While I enjoy it to add any sort of sexual connotation to it is just sickening. There is absolutely nothing about my child EVER that is sexual to me. My breasts become solely a source of nutrition the moment she cries in hunger. To imply anything else is very absurd and disturbing that a person would think that. It really makes me wonder about the person who would think that.

The comment about DCS really killed me though. That was beyond laughable to me.

There is a bill in the state of Tennessee that makes it illegal for a woman to breastfeed a child in public past the age of 12 months. Currently there is a bill on the table to remove that age limit. I just wrote to my local representative today to tell them that I support that bill. How interesting that this topic would come up at the same time. I know that people are a little weirded about by both extended nursing and nursing in public. But who is the government to say what age my milk starts becoming a bad thing for my child? Especially when both the WHO recommends breastfeeding up to 2 years and beyond as does the AAP which states breastfeeding should be the ideal feeding method for the first year and beyond and mutually desired for both mother and child.

In the second year (12-23 months), 448 mL of breastmilk provides:

• 29% of energy requirements
• 43% of protein requirements
• 36% of calcium requirements
• 75% of vitamin A requirements
• 76% of folate requirements
• 94% of vitamin B₁₂ requirements
• 60% of vitamin C requirements

-- Dewey 2001

The benefits of breastmilk do not magically stop once your child reaches a magical number of 12 months old. A mother's body still produces the perfect nutrition beyond that first year. The comments about how the WHO only recommended it past one to other countries because there is no food to eat is a little silly. There is not other food (OR diet) that is going to provide ^ that amazing source of nutrition.

I am proud to be a nursing mother. I am proud to support my baby through the process of leading the way to when she wants to wean. My oldest self weaned. She slowly dropped feedings as she got older until she was finished. No whining, no crying, no struggles. No breast infections, no pumping, no engorgement. That is the way to go! I fully hope my nursing relationship will be the same with this little one. She's going to be a year old in two weeks and I have no plans on stopping in any foreseeable future.

It's great to know these comments and attitudes exist. I want to keep them around to remind myself what it is we are fighting for sometimes.

Bet You Can't Guess Where I Am

Well, I'll forgo the suspense. I'm in a hotel. In my hometown. Not more than 10 minutes from my house.

With the husband, the kids and the cats. haha! For at least a week.

Turns out there's mold in my basement. Started with a leak from the washing machine. We're hoping it's not too bad and has only affected one wall right behind where the washer is. BUT of course, we still have to get it cleaned up.

I am not sure if I have mentioned it, but my Mother in Law moved in with us not long ago. She was alone in her house after Father in law died, and it didn't seem right to have her there alone. So we cleaned out our basement and turned it into a little efficiency apartment for her. So that's where she's been. It's kind of cute down there actually.

She was sick. Like several rounds of antibiotics and even steroid shots kind of sick. Funny thing is, all of us upstairs had been battling a 'cold' for the past six weeks or so as well. I've been on antibiotics for a sinus infections. MIL a bacterial infection. Rebel has been on several rounds of antibiotics for an ear infection. When MIL's doctor said, "Maybe there's mold in the house?" huh.

We are kind of young and new to home owning. It never even occurred to us. So we had a professional come in and do the test, and lo and behold. Yup.

If it ain't one thing it's another as they say. Blargh.

So, it's going to take at least 2-3 days to clean up. We moved MIL into brother in laws house with her dog for a bit, and two cats in with a friend, and took two cats and the kids to a hotel.

I'm trying to stick to my 'crunchy' ways as much as possible.

I packed overtly heavy. A family of four plus pets in a week long hotel stay already requires a bit of packing.

Add in a full set of plates, cups, bowls, dish soap, baby proofing items, things to entertain everyone, (Diapers cause I am not allowed to use my cloth at the moment, BOO!) food that I preplanned and packed, etc and you have a hefty load to haul! Add in the homeschooling books and materials too and wow! haha

We are having a good time though. I decided to go with a hotel that had an indoor pool and hot tub and things for a little bit more so we could have some fun and take our minds off the stress of everything going on. After school we plan to head down to the pool and relax for a few. We have dinner's made up and in the fridge.

The Little One has a basket of toys spread out in the floor and is playing away. It will be an interesting week!

Lil is still going to be working on her schoolwork.

Coming out of the Closet, Intactavist!

I'm coming out of the closet, hypotethically, to say, I am an Intactavist! I am. I can't really proclaim I'm coming out because anyone who knows me, knows this. BUT I do have a habit of staying a little quite on the subject.

I do have a "what's done is done' mentality to it. I can't do anything about a baby that has already been cut. So if a mother says it's already been done, I'll shrug and move on.

Maybe, that's a problem though. Maybe I need to speak out more.
But I'm getting ahead of myself. First, what exactly am I talking about?

Intactavist: A person who is for the rights of children to remain genitally intact. One who is against routine circumcision.

I have only girls, so maybe that's why I've felt a little shy about really coming out about this. I guess I felt people would say I don't really know what I would do.
But that's not true. I've had 40 weeks (Two pregnancies, and 20 weeks until gender determined) to ponder and debate and get info on "Well, if the baby is a boy, what will we do with his Penis?"

Even that question alone should make one stumble a bit upon reading it.

"What will we do with HIS penis?"

Is it my penis? Do I have a right to decide what to do with his penis? Does a parent have that right? And WHY?

I do not feel that I have the right to cosmetically change my child, with no medical reasoning, with out their consent. It's NOT my right in my opinion.

Female Genital altering is finally seen as taboo. It was not that long ago that it was not either people, we can change our views with knowledge and proper education. Why is it socially acceptable (In certain areas) to allow baby boys to mutilated?

I fully believe the only two reasons a person would circumcise is cruelty and ignorance. Mainly ignorance. The problem is a lot like breastfeeding. The knowledge, education and support are just not out there. People where I live are Baptist because their parents were Baptist, people are Democratics because their family is Democrat, they formula feed because their mother couldn't 'make milk', they circumcise because their father/husband/cousin/boyfriends were circumcised.

The problem is, people do not stop to think. It just is. They just do. They do what was always done. I just can't believe that any caring, understanding, well informed parent would still choose such an unnecessary procedure if they were given the true, accurate information and portrayal of it.

I hear the same stories/excuses/arguments each time.

It needs to be done because his father is done and he'll 'look different'.

Silly. I'm sorry, but of course he will 'look different'. Why is that an excuse for boys? There are thousands of different 'types' of vagina's. I mean, c'mon, just look here: WARNING Real vulva photos

I have two girls. I shower with them, they've seen me naked a million times. They have been in the bathroom with me a thousand times. It's never occurred to them to ask, "Hey Mom, why do you have this and I have that?" A girl will notice that they do not have breasts and her mother does, or her mother has pubic hair and she does not. Heck, even arm pit hair when they are lazy and haven't shaved (haha!) OR just doesn't want to! But I've never heard of a little girl saying, "You have flaps, and i don't!" or anything along those lines.
What about a mother and a little boy. But of course, he is going to notice he has a penis and she doesn't. Who cares.
Furthermore, why can you not just offer an explanation for WHY they are different? That never seems to come up as an option.

I have to do it because it is the social norm.
Not true. First of all most men in the world are intact.

US Rates
And the rates are going up every year to keep boys intact, even in the United States.

But he will get infections, and sick.
To me, this is by far the silliest one. First, go back to the link I provided above that states most men in the world are intact. So, all of those men, have infected penis's! They have diseases? Even most of them? That is completely inaccurate. The AAP does not support circumcision per the small amount of data supporting these claims: "ABSTRACT. Existing scientific evidence demonstrates

potential medical benefits of newborn male circumcision; however, these data are not sufficient to recommend routine neonatal circumcision."

This Blog actually lists the reasons and myths very well, so I'll just link there and save myself the embarrassment of trying to say it better. ;-)

I have friends in Europe, Sweden, France, Germany, etc all of those places it is not a common procedure. In a discussion I had with one of the moms I know in Canada she stated that the doctors there will actually try to talk you OUT of it if you did so inquire and IF you still decided to do it, insurance will not cover it, period, and you have to pay the doctor in cash before the procedure. Wonder how many American moms would still do it?

This is the device they use to hold your little one down while they do the procedure

Here's the full range of instruments used

I've read many accounts of moms who say that it does not even hurt or effect the baby. They forget about it in seconds. That also, is simply not true. I've also read numerous accounts of doctors and nurses that say they tell these parents this to make them feel better. I've also read many studies about the psychological effects of the procedure which will often times cause the baby to go into such a state of shock that they can not even cry they are so traumatized. Often a mother is unable to console the baby and nurse because they are so affected and upset. This is an older article but still relevant.

I also really like the Penn & Teller's episode about the subject: (Strong language and video)

http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=416_1218124584

A few more great articles and sites:
http://www.circumstitions.com
http://www.doctorsopposingcircumcision.org/pdf/GenitalIntegrityStatement.pdf
Circumcision Deaths: http://www.cirp.org/library/death/ (55 in the year 2010)

I ask any mother to look at the links and videos I provided above. To read fully through the sites and links. I implore you to ask yourselves, is this really your decision to make? Is it really your choice to inflict pain onto your infant and hinder his sexual pleasure later in life? To leave his penis vulnerable to infection? To allow your son to go through an unneeded surgical procedure, "just because"? I would never ever wish it on anyone, but what if your child was one of the ones that died because of complications to this cosmetic procedure? Could you live with that decision?